I noticed that lately when I sit around on the floor and watch my kids play, I feel a slight resentment. Like I should be doing something better with my life. Like I'm just wasting time and could be doing the laundry, sewing, working on my websites.
I didn't feel this way when my first 3 were small. I sat around with them and played and didn't think twice about it. I also didn't have 3 business to run, a house to clean and homeschooling to do.
Nevertheless, I tell myself that I'm a stay at home mom for a reason. I don't want someone else raising my kids. I don't want to miss the firsts. I would miss my kids and do enjoy being around them all day (for the most part). They are so creative and make me so proud everyday. But I also feel happy to have my businesses. To chat with other moms with the same interests and feel like I'm providing some great services, whether to help spotlight work at home children's clothing designers or make some super squishy diapers, it's important to me.
I guess I just need to focus on the fact that my kids are only small for such a short time and I want to enjoy them. To not get upset when I'm laying on the floor and they are crawling and jumping all over me and I have other "work" to do. To stop and watch the beautiful children God gave me. I know I will want these days back when they are all grown up.
So there...my struggle put into words. I already feel better and ready to face tomorrow. I hope it's sunny and we can go for a walk together. Who cares about the laundry ;) it won't go anywhere.
No comments:
Post a Comment